sleep much?

well i ususally stay up later than i would like because my mind keeps goin and goin and so last night I had some really interesting and deep juicy thoughts about relationships...not so new

but these philosophies were. I got to thinking about my next romantic encounter and what do I really want? a committed relationship, boyfriend, companionship what?

well I do want a boyfriend but what I want more is companionship. The titles boyfriend and girlfriend really don't hold that much weight. HUSBAND, WIFE those are what matter. I want to someday be someones WIFE but until then I really just want companionship I want to have relations with a man whos company I enjoy who I have an acceptance for and vice versa a nice good looking, good dressing, good smelling man. lol seriously though like I just kinda daydream about meeting someone who I have a great connection with but it's not a marriage type super exclusive thing. Now don't jump around and conclude and stuff. Cheating and things are unacceptable but that's my point if you don't treat relationships as marriages then those things aren't something to worry about. Ehh lemme explain. I want to be with someone but I don't want it to be an i own you you own me type of thing just a relaxed relationship. I don't want to get LOVE involved I think I should save that for the man I am to marry as well as serious affection. Hugs and kisses and all that are nice but those things seem to distract the deeper connection. many relationships start off physical. wrong. I want to almost test and see how long a relationship can last if it is primarily mental and "spiritual." I want to see how deep love can really get and be like, you know when people are married and they don't have to always say I love you because they just know. I want it to be like that almost, an experience if you will. Wonderful blissful amazing unlike any other. You may or may not get what i'm saying but hopefully you feel it..

Blah.